During this Pisces eclipse cycle, I have been able to do little else but face my fears, work through my shadows, reflect, heal, and evolve. I have been spun through the turbulent waters of transformation and growth to say the least. I am still reeling, reflecting, feeling, thinking, writing, talking about how much has changed within me. It will take time to process it all. Not to mention the recent Libra eclipse cycle (my moon) and the Aquarius eclipse cycle (my rising) that begins in August.
Through all of this upheaval, I’m grateful for my practice and writing that has documented and helped me through so much of this work. It comes in handy when you need to see how far you’ve come. I wanted to share something from my journal that I wrote in April of last year, in honor of the Oyster card in today’s reading. I hope it resonates with those of you who are doing shadow work.
Drudging through, pushing forward, yearning as weight is gained and shackles are illuminated: their presence sharp and unyielding. I want to be free. I ache, beg, plead for help, for guidance, for transcendence, for some kind of release.
My words are stifled, trapped between my soul and my pen, kept captive to the monsters and cowardice that have taken over my mind. Doubt. Fear. Shame. Insecurity. They all come from the mind. The heart is stronger than the brain, I remind myself. Thank goodness for that or how else could humanity be anything but damned?
I keep moving forward, sometimes blind, sometimes veering off course, but my heart knows freedom, my soul calls for nothing less, while my mind pushes, pulls, stutters, starts, grows, retracts… No wonder the swords are so present in my readings. As my shadows are brought into the light, the more I understand, the more I see, the more I am able to free myself from their bondage and reintegrate. There is such pain to face along the way and oh, the mind is so damn stubborn.
I am coming to understand that it is not our souls nor our hearts that need liberating, but our minds.
I’m sure I will have much more to share as I reflect back upon my journey.
Thanks for reading.